I know it has been on all your minds...why the crazy villain 'stache. Because! I've been called Luigi, Dali, Snidely Whiplash, and sinister. I've been called pretentious, over-zealous, and shameless. I agree with you all. I don't use hairspray as doing so would 'cause brain damage and provide trips that I just don't want to go on. I use Clubman Mustache Wax:

It is simple to apply and smells like the air after a light rain. My reason for growing the 'stache is quite unclear even to me. Everyone wants a reason especially since I've been curling the ends lately. I just like it. My favorite characters from the old silent, noir, and western films I believe have a large subconscious influence on me. I also believe that Brandon Flowers, the lead singer for The Killers, and his recent mustache growth was a trigger for me. Whatever the reason may be the fact remains...I like my mustache. Your last and final question, I'm sure is how long will this "phase" of mine last...here's your answer:

(All in due time! Muahaha!)